I don't want to get anyone too excited, but we're only two entries away from the Barbara Cartland title I read to go with the relevant entry title. I'm sure you're all on tenterhooks.

I saw Kim Next Door as I walked past her garden this morning. Last time I spoke to her, she said her 20-year-old son was leaving soon to spend a year living with his grandparents in the UK. Today I said that must be near. Very near, in fact: his flight is at 9 am tomorrow. Oh, right, so he's all packed and ready to go? Kim sighed. 'Well, he's packed two surfboards.'

It turns out he's not as disorganised as all that. He just has to wax his third surfboard, and it will be ready to pack too. Just a year's worth of clothes left to go, then.